Dating, moving in together, marriage and … Money!!
You found Mr. or Ms. Right and you are thinking about the next step, and then the discussion about money is on the horizon. How do you bring it up? How do you figure out if your financial goals mesh? What if they don’t? How do you bare it all and survive the conversation? So, back to Cosmopolitan Magazine, May addition and an article by Erin Lowry.
Advice on Discussing Money
She suggests hashing out the money issues before you get so serious. What follows are tips on how to have a difficult conversation before it’s too late to bail.
Set the mood
Make a request to talk about finances but keep it light. A quick message stating something like ‘ been thinking about money and would love to share my thoughts with you’. This can make the request to talk about it but in a non-threatening way.
Come prepared
Know what your income, expenses, assets, financial goals and expectations are. Be prepared to ask him or her the same questions. Don’t be upset if they are not as prepared as you. You can revisit the conversation later when they have had time to prepare.
Initial Intimacy
Share with your partner the financial things you like about them. Do they give to charity? Do they help family members? Do they save for the future? Let them know what you like and then delve, gently, into the things that you both may need to negotiate.
Can Your Plans Mesh?
Once you have figured out where both of you are and your goals figure out if they mesh. If they don’t, can they? If they can’t, now is the time to decide to move on. Money is the root of many a failed marriage. Don’t let that be you.
Get Help
If you think that assistance from an outside source would be helpful, talk to your pastor, trusted family member, or an attorney. Maybe the issues of bad back debt held by your partner can be fixed through legitimate credit counseling or a bankruptcy. You never know until you seek solutions. Contact Moseman Law Office, LLC today to discuss money concerns, bankruptcy, or credit counseling.